Author Topic: Need some advice  (Read 103 times)

Pervarotti

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Need some advice
« on: June 12, 2017, 12:15:17 pm »
A friend of mine got a DUI years ago and thus has zero tolerance rule... he can't have any alcohol in his system.

For a few years now we having been driving to his house (about 5 miles down a busy road) to pick him off and we drop him off.  Adam drives.  This friend now expects it, sends texts like "Pick me up"  no asking, no please and almost never says thanks.

It really started to get on my nerves.   Why can't he pay $5-$10 for a Lyft or Uber?   Why does he think Adam should risk a DUI and possible get de-barred from practicing as an attorney?   The time and gas adds up.  Why not say thank you?

Last night the 3 of us were at a bar by my house.  I took Lyft home, they ended up staying out til 1 and went to another bar, father away.  I sent Adam a text "Please don't drive across town to drop him off."  Adam wrote back "Ok"


This morning Adam told me he gave the guy a ride across town after drinking for hours at 1 am.  I was fucking pissed.  $10 at most for an Uber versus Adam might get in a accident or DUI, de-barred, etc?   


My first responses was that we start telling him we can't pick him up.   But right now I want to send him a text that he is being selfish imposing on Adam at such a risk when he can take an Uber.   Not sure how to word it or if I should not get involved.  If Adam gets a DUI, it's going to fuck up my life too.   I would never impose on a friend like that. 

MUFDVR

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Re: Need some advice
« Reply #1 on: June 12, 2017, 01:24:20 pm »
This is easy. Tell him to use Uber and stop being a mooch.  With Uber, there is no excuse for anyone to be driving drunk.  It's as if the whole business model was designed around getting drunken fucktards from A to B.   I don't drive anywhere anymore.

Put your foot down.  Adam needs to back you up and do the same.  If he doesn't, call him a pussy after you call him fat and his mom a whore.

Wait until the next time he asks for a ride and tell him. I wouldn't do it until then. 
I mongered Dillver's mom.

Pervarotti

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Re: Need some advice
« Reply #2 on: June 12, 2017, 01:43:34 pm »
Adam keeps saying its no big deal and he always used to drive his friends around.

I totally grilled him about it this morning.   We already talked about it and he agreed not to last night, then did it anyway.

You think its okay for me to poke my nose in and text this guy that it's not fair that he is putting Adam at risk?  I think he will hate me if I say anything. After all Adam should have said no.

Pervarotti

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Re: Need some advice
« Reply #3 on: June 12, 2017, 01:48:58 pm »
Maybe the next time Adam wants to fuck,

I should tell him to go fuck that guy since he has more pull with Adam than I do.

I'm pissed at the guy, but really this is on Adam.   He made a stupid decision.


MUFDVR

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Re: Need some advice
« Reply #4 on: June 12, 2017, 03:38:33 pm »
Yeah, it's on Adam.  I wouldn't say shit to that guy until the next time he asks you for a ride.  Adam needs to step up and join the team for the big win.   
I mongered Dillver's mom.

laker

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Re: Need some advice
« Reply #5 on: June 12, 2017, 04:07:26 pm »
Just don't pick him up once or twice. Ignore the txt and apologize half heartedly the next day. He'll get the point.   Ass cash or grass no one rides for free

Silver Mercenary

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Re: Need some advice
« Reply #6 on: June 12, 2017, 05:29:09 pm »
yup, u dont need to say shit to the guy. next time he needs a ride, just say "I'll just call you an uber or taxi"..tell Adam to do the same..eventually he'll get the hint

reinforcement schedule - do not reward his behavior
#9LivesMatter #Meow

Gooey

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Re: Need some advice
« Reply #7 on: June 12, 2017, 05:54:17 pm »
This is the bigger problem, "We already talked about it and he agreed not to last night, then did it anyway."

Seems like lying to you and putting his buddies before you is Adam's priority.

Captain Caveman

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Re: Need some advice
« Reply #8 on: June 13, 2017, 03:56:35 pm »
Adam and this guy is putting not only their lives at risk, but the other folks on the road as well AND your husband's career and you're worried about making this guy mad??

When he texts again, tell him you and Adam are taking Uber and suggest he do the same because you all will not be driving when you go out.

Tell Adam if he is going to drink and drive to take out additional life insurance. You want to be a wealthy widow.

Pervarotti

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Re: Need some advice
« Reply #9 on: June 13, 2017, 05:44:46 pm »
I complained to Adam quite a bit.   He kept saying STOP and making excuses. 

Sent the friend a text

"Adam should not have drove last night.  He will be de-barred if he gets a DUI."

His reply
"Yea I know.  We both got drunk.  Wasn't thinking"     - dude has a DUI he knew damn well what they were doing, and worse he posted pictures of lined up shot glasses around 1 am on facebook.

then a few minutes later he texts again

"Sorry.   We're idiots last night"



I think our friend got the message.   


The bigger issue is that Adam doesn't seem to have any remorse about lying to me.   And last night when we went out he refused to drink anything at all because he kept saying he didn't want to get a DUI.   Fun times.   Another dinner of silence.   

We used to have fun together. 
« Last Edit: June 13, 2017, 05:46:36 pm by Pervarotti »

Gooey

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Re: Need some advice
« Reply #10 on: June 13, 2017, 06:02:23 pm »
Put his ass on the couch until he feels remorse. I can't believe we have to tell you, a woman, how to punish your husband!

Ogre

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Re: Need some advice
« Reply #11 on: June 14, 2017, 11:38:41 am »
Put his ass on the couch until he feels remorse. I can't believe we have to tell you, a woman, how to punish your husband!


I told my wife that if she doesn't feel like she can sleep next to me, then it's on her to sleep somewhere else. I'm not going to be relegated to the couch (guest bed, actually). It's never happened though... unless you count snoring during allergy season, we tend to alternate to the guest room when that's going down.

Gooey

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Re: Need some advice
« Reply #12 on: June 14, 2017, 11:53:00 am »
Yeah, but you and Nicole have a much different relationship. Plus you have a pony that will always take your side no matter who is at fault in a disagreement!

Ogre

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Re: Need some advice
« Reply #13 on: June 14, 2017, 01:42:33 pm »
Yeah, but you and Nicole have a much different relationship. Plus you have a pony that will always take your side no matter who is at fault in a disagreement!
He's not allowed on the bed, though, so his opinion holds no sway.

Gooey

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Re: Need some advice
« Reply #14 on: June 14, 2017, 04:28:56 pm »
That's because he doesn't fit on the bed!